Monday, December 27, 2010

SUFFERING LOSS

It has been an emotional week for many. I have prayed for my friend, Edie, and her husband and her children. I feel her pain even though my home has never burned to the ground. I feel her pain not because I want to, but because I need to. It doesn't matter if everything inside of me is screaming that is is not about me; I know that in some ways it is. I still have lessons to learn when it comes to loss.

We all face it at some point--and we are rarely expecting it or have prepared for it. Things--in an instant change--forever. But we know that all things work together for good to those that love the Lord and that our ways are not His ways.  And with every ounce of faith you can muster up, you will yourself to believe it and accept it. And the idea of faith being fused with actions is repeated in your mind--in the lucid moments. And you take that one step. And then you take another. And then you are actually living the life of faith. You become a doer and not just a hearer. And it is hard. It is very hard.

And life goes on--but the music has changed, and your steps must now be chosen to match the new rhythm and beat. And you adjust--just like they said you would. And you return to the land of the living for a season or two or three. 

And then, from time to time, you are invited to return to that place.  You would like to decline, but your heart  actually wants to go there--to that place that you have so neatly tucked away. Because it is now part of what defines you. It is a place of wonder and pain and what-ifs. Wonder at the sheer thought of survival. Pain at what that survival cost you--or what you think it cost you. And the realization that not one thing that is present reality would look the same if not for the past reality. Not one thing. One simple--or not so simple--veer in your life's path, and everything changes. There are no what-ifs.

And you realize that you wouldn't change a thing--you couldn't change a thing.  This is your wonderful life. And the intimate moments with the Lord as He wraps His loving arms around you and patiently teaches you the lessons you must learn become what you yearn for. And the question changes from Why? to What now, Lord? And you accept the fact that we look through a mirror dimly. And you accept the fact that some things just cant be replaced, because there is no replacement value calculated on the loss of what could have been. There is no price on broken dreams or broken hearts or broken memories. 

And as Edie texted me on Christmas morning:  The Lord gives and the Lord takes away.  Blessed be the name of the Lord!

And through acceptance comes growth and a closer walk with the God that is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow--the God that is the constant when life spins out of control.  And when others suffer loss, He is the God that reminds you that His grace is sufficient and His power is made perfect in weakness.  And through the tears, you heal a bit more.  And you pray for the same for others.

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.  Romans 5:8

20 comments:

Kelly said...

Wow. Good post.

Debbie said...

Really love this post! You have said it all so well. As I read it I was thinking "so true", "oh yea,I know how that feels", "I agree".
God bless you friend!

Kolein said...

Thank you.

Folding it together 1 load at a time!! said...

Well said, Denise, it has been an emotional time for our family, as well. This past year brought much loss to our family, even though our earthly being still mourns the loss, we are assured by the love of God, through His son Jesus that we will be together again and that He is in control at all times. It has definitely been a year of journey for me and my family and He has been steadfast throught it all! I may not know Edie and her family as intimately as you do, but I have prayed for her and her family earnestly since Kelly shared the news of her tragedy with me one week ago. I know God has plans for them and will follow this journey with them.
I love you and your heart felt love for those around you.

Dena

David said...

I have read Edie's blog for a couple of years...don't know her in person, but feel like I Know her through Him! Have been and will continue to pray for her and her family. I can't imagine the loss. The lyrics to 'Blessed be Your Name" are the words Edie texted you. This song was powerful to my husband and I during a time of great loss. Thank you for sharing about Edie!
Laurin

Funky Junk Interiors said...

It's hard to put what I'm feeling into words. I too know what loss is all about, but one just has to have faith that it's part of a bigger plan with deeper meaning.

All the same, I'm deeply saddened by Eddie's loss. I'm also excited to hear the awesome outcome it will eventually have. The story is far from over...

Donna

martinealison said...

Eddie et sa famille peuvent compter sur mon soutien psychologique... Je prie pour eux... Bisous

Annie @ The House That Jade Built said...

Beautiful post!

"And then you are actually living the life of faith. You become a doer and not just a hearer. And it is hard. It is very hard."

That statement couldn't be any more true. When you start truly living the life of faith, it is hard, you stumble, you fall, you cry, you question, you tremble, but when you choose faith as your focus - your walk with God becomes closer & you grow in ways you never knew possible. It's amazing what trusting in God does to your heart. Many prayers are going out from my heart for Edie's!

Stacy said...

Amen. Like many others I have read Edie's blog for a while now; I have been inspired in my home and encouraged in my faith.

I thought of her last night as we sang 'Rock of Ages' at church.

I, too, look forward to the rest of the story.

Jen T said...

I'm in awe at Edie's strong faith shining through this tragic loss of her home. God bless her & her family for remaining true servants of the Lord and praising Him in ALL things. Praying for all of them. JenT

Mrs. Doodle said...

I can't stop thinking about Edie... I know He has a plan.

I know I am not alone in saying... if there is anything we could all come together to do for Edie and her family please let us know. We would all be so happy to pitch in.

Carol S. said...

Heard of Edie from Rhoda...and have lifted her family in my prayers. Just noodled around your site and have been inspired by your word and life and love of God. God bless you too.

Gretchen said...

A beautiful post. My husband recently lost his job. It was completely unexpected but I know that things could be so much worse. Thank you for the reminder that God is in all things even when we don't understand his ways.

Anonymous said...

Is there anyone that has/or is going to start some type of campaign for Edie??? Would love to help replace things or give money to a fund towards her rebuilding process. That's what this season is all about....and Lord knows she's given so much to all of her readers! Let us know and let's spread the word!

One of His Sparrows said...

You had me in the first paragraph. When we deal with loss or pain sometimes we tend to "shut down" in order to keep going. We tread in order to keep our heads above water so so we can breathe. But we are called by Him, to jump in and swim, to share one another's pain. And through our pain He blesses us with deeper fellowship with him. Phil 3:10. The events in Edie's life this Christmas have forced us to jump in, swim and be changed.

Yolanda said...

I found Edie's blog on Christmas day as I did yours and since then I can't stop thinking about her loss. I haven't had my house burn but i HAVE SUFFERED MANY losses in my life and I know what she is going through. I will continue to pray for her . I think this post is so good and I will be reading your blog all throughout the coming year.
I hope you have the baest year ever.

artteachergirl said...

Such a touching post! Very well said! All of us have had our music change and have had to change our steps...such a beautiful way to put it into words. Blessed new year! Vicki

FinsFan said...

we will be praying for Edie....i just read this and was so sad to hear what they are going through.

lauranell.com said...

Lovely post. As my family has faced many losses and struggles this past year it has been amazing to see the blessings that have come right alongside those sorrows. Blessed be the name of the Lord indeed!

Andrea from Raising Peanut said...

Hi, I just found your blog. I like this post b/c it rang true for me. I lost my husband in 2010... not to death, but a different death in a way.

He walked away from me and our life together. He does not want to come home, altho he has not D'd me yet. He rarely looks back.

We have a tiny two-year old son together, and that breaks my heart also.

I have been trying to move on these past nine months. Part of me is still in shock. Part of me still hopes and believes he'll return. But like you write about the pain of loss... it's so great. We have to move forward, but there ARE times to visit those places again. No one wants you to go back, and of course we can't live there. But we are human and we feel, we love, we experience, we hurt, we mend and we heal. Hopefully we grow.

Pray for me and my husband please? And our little son? I have tears now as I read your post and write this comment.

Thank you! :)